Less time, loads of homework and lists upon lists of tasks. Many students are familiar with the responsibilities that come with each step closer to the freedom of adulthood. For some students, however, this responsibility is sometimes amplified by another reason: a younger sibling.
Camilla Piedra (10) has a 5-year-old brother named Max, who is in kindergarten. Although her parents take care of most tasks and raising her brother, she has been helping with some of the load since he was a toddler and feels that she spends a lot of time taking care of him.
“If [Max] has work, sometimes I’ll help out with that or I’ll help him with his toys to clean up, or eating his food,” Piedra said.
Piedra typically gets up around 5:30 in the morning and leaves around 6:30 so that her mother can drop her off at school and go back home to take her brother in time to ensure he gets enough sleep. She also leaves school later because her brother gets out of school at 3 p.m. For Piedra, this routine has upsides and downsides.
“I would rather sleep in, but I do like getting out of school later,” Piedra said.
For some students like Piedra, this responsibility has little effect on her social life nor does it cause any stress. However, taking care of her brother does sometimes interfere with her academics. Her parents are sometimes away from home because her father works and her mother runs errands.
“[At times] I have to take care of him when my parents are out and I can’t really do my homework because he’s doing stuff,” Piedra said.
For others, however, the responsibility of younger siblings can look different. NaCoria Love is a senior who takes care of four younger siblings. They are split across two houses, with two 8-year-old twins at her dad’s house (in the third grade). The other two, an 8-year-old in the second grade and a 6-year-old in the first grade. She mainly lives at her mother’s house, but sometimes stays at her father’s to watch her siblings when she needs to.
“Like halfway through my junior year is when my dad started his overnight job, and I would keep them overnight,” Love said. “[My dad] would make sure we had dinner and everything before he left, but I would have to make sure they [got] bathed and [did] their homework, [had] their stuff ready and make sure they [went to bed on time] and things like that while he was at work, and then he would get home in time to take us to school in the morning.”
Due to the extent of her parents’ work, Love often finds herself taking on an extra load when she is the only one available. Her tasks extend beyond just watching her younger siblings.
“Now that I drive … if my mom has something to do after school, she’s asked me a lot to pick them up from school, because we both live kind of far from the schools that we go to. Also, [similarly], my dad will ask me to pick them up from school if he has to go to work or something like that. Right now, I think [the main task] is driving because I have my license and I have my car, so now [my parents] have another point of contact.”
In addition to taking care of her twin siblings, she has duties taking care of her siblings at her mother’s house, which are similar in nature and just as impactful on her day-to-day life. However, they come with their own separate demands.
“My mom also has a second job; she teaches but she also does hair, so on the weekends she’s out of the house early in the morning, so that’s also me taking care of my siblings until she comes home later,” Love said.
Love does JROTC, so she stays after school on Tuesdays and Fridays until 4:00 p.m. and also has a job, though the hours are not strict. Now that her younger siblings are more independent, it does not put much pressure on her academics, as her parents make sure to check in on her. However, it does have an impact on her social life.
“If my stepdad has work and my mom also has work, then it’s like [my siblings] don’t have anywhere else to go, so it’s kind of like I’m obligated to watch them and make sure that they’re good,” Love said. “Obviously I wanna hang out with my friends and stuff, but I guess it can [interfere with that].”
Although taking care of her brothers and sisters affects her life, Love finds meaning in the task. She feels that her siblings make it relatively easy for her, and they make it enjoyable for her to care for them.
“Hanging out with them and seeing how their personalities are growing as they’re getting older and figuring out who they are is really fun to see even though our age gap is quite [wide],” Love said.